Tired and Emotional

Last week was my busiest week of the year. I should have been on a real high, it was the first time most people had seen me since the op, and I felt I looked great.

There was a lot going on and I was tired, and it got to me, and I let it. Each morning the alarm went off early, I couldn't get myself out of bed and I just lay there worrying about the day ahead. Then I got stressed and simply didn't enjoy it like I should have.

I have great friends and they got me through it, and as the last day approached I thought I would have my first drink to celebrate. Disaster. One sip of champagne and the bubbles stuck in my throat, so I tried a brandy, I could suck the ice but the brandy stayed on the top like oil on water. These were both on empty stomachs so later after food I tried red wine, which was the most successful but not really, and finally Guinness (it contains iron, it should have been medicinal); another failure.

Basically I was just tired and it set off a vicious circle, hopefully I can relax and get past this, it wasn't me and I ended up in tears one night, when surrounded by friends. I am not concerned, I know it will pass, just want it to be quick. I am a worrier but stress is a step too far.

And to those wonderful friends, who got me through it. Thank You.

Sorry for the Slow Update

Sorry it is so long since my last update. Thanks to all those who sent me emails of encouragement, and thanks Tigger (whoever you are) for the comment. Good Luck to you.

So after my fail weekend I lost just a 1/2 Kg, but that is OK, if I had lost more I would think it wasn't an issue. This last week however I have lost another Kg and am now less than 1Kg off 100Kg.

I see the doctor on Thursday which will  be 8 weeks so I hope he will be pleased with me and then I get a real target and I have to start the serious exercise.

Fail, Fail, Fail

On of the factors for this route to weight loss is my lifestyle. When I am away from home I eat food that is too rich and when I am at home I eat the right food but far, far too much of it.

If this was me, I would be happy

So now nearly 6 weeks post op, I can tolerate most food but still just a little at a time. This is my busiest period of the year and I have simply failed in my effort to be good.

Last week I worked 2 days at home plus the weekend, and still vsiited the fridge every hour or so. No big deal as it only contained cheese triangles, activa drinks and very small portions of chili but it is habit and I wasn't even hungry. This week I have been at a conference and hardly ate at all, and then practically had to drag myself to bed at 7.30pm.

Big Failure, must do better

First Exercise

Six week after surgery I am supposed to start real exercise. I am in the sixth week, so not quite there yet but today I decided to cycle to the village to post some letters. It is only 2 miles there and back but there is a hill at my end.

It was harder than I expected and I couldn't tackle anything that needed me to work the stomach muscles but I did it, just had to walk up the hill bit.

So the exercise will have to start with getting fit first. still you have to start somewhere and I enjoyed the fresh air.

I Can't wake up in the Mornings!!!!!!!!

I have been on the iron supplements for a week, and yes they are helping. I am able to stay up and function later than I was but still tucked up in my bed by 10.30 each evening. The issue I have is getting up in the mornings.  I know that to many of you that is normal, but not for me. I am an early person, and do most of my work, and defiantly my best work, early in the day. Now the only thing I do well first thing is hit the 'snooze' button on the alarm clock. This might not seem a big deal, and you may just say 'take it easy, don't worry', but you see I do worry, I am a worrier.

My biggest issue is flying, I do a lot of flying, most of it is domestic travel and should be less stressful, but in the last few weeks, I haven't been able to sleep, which I crave, because I am worrying too much that I won't wake up when it is time for my flight. Yesterday my flight home was at 7am, so I set the alarm for 5am, but was awake from 3.30am making sure I didn't hit that snooze button. Just to make sure I did wake up, I also had my iPhone set (twice), the TV alarm and a hotel 'early morning call'.

So I need the tiredness to get packing, so I can go back to being alert the minute the alarm rings, and tick that worry off my list.

Almost at a Special place

Week 5 over, in some ways it has gone fast, in others it seems such a long time ago; but now 5 weeks since I had my operation and 7 since i started the weight loss. as you know my target is to drop 42 Kg and it is going well, but small incremental targets are also important. If we talk in terms of my food mountain I am working on a bag of flour a week, i.e 1.5kg or just over 3lb.

This week I have done it again and the official weigh in is 102.5Kg but that says to me that in less than 2 weeks I will go under 100Kg and that is something i would dream about. Still a long, long way (bad pun) to go, but a very important milestone.

Finally Weight Loss in Pictures

 

I have promised this since the beginning but I have been too tired, but I had enough energy today for a to-do list and even got a few things ticked off.

This was the 42Kg I have set myself as a target.

Remember the weeks mentioned include the 2 weeks pre op liver diet

After 4 weeks I had lost 10.5Kg - one quarter

After 6 weeks 14Kg - one third





Still have a long way to go, 2 thirds or 28Kg but it looks good